Category: Bereavement/Grief/loss

Stress Awareness & Warnings

“A healthy person has a thousand wishes, a sick person only one.”    Stress is often considered to be normal, but what starts off as normal, can very easily turn nasty.   A certain amount of stress in the form of exercise, excitement, fresh challenges and life saving reactiveness is all good, so when does stress turn into something else?

Whatever harms your health and vitality is wise to be aware of.   If you feel constantly tired, overwhelmed or emotionally reactive; stress chemicals flood your body to fight, flight or freeze.   When the perceived ‘threat’ is over, the body will do everything it can to re-establish balance.   However, if the threat is workload, challenging relationships, time pressures, inner conflicts or fear, these will compound over time and threaten your quality of life.   Life events are not in themselves a stress.  Awareness is a state of mind that can be developed and improved.  A ‘perceiver’ who is in a state of moment by moment awareness (as oppose to reactiveness) interprets a situation, with a choice to respond with calm or stress.  Setbacks and even a rejection can be perceived as a stressful frustration or a challenge.  Uncomfortable/fearful/stressful emotions cannot be processed if resisted, so if a person avoids and represses a painful emotion,  it can become stuck in the body and mind, and act as a future stress trigger.

Warning:  If stress becomes constant or extreme, symptoms of adrenal fatigue are lowered immune system, hormonal imbalances, Chronic Fatigue, Fibromyalgia, ME, MS, IBS and mood swings.   If the thyroid system becomes over strained…it is irreversible.

Do any of these feel familiar?  Feeling fatigued or exhausted… snapping at your loved ones…feeling that you need to defend yourself all the time…blaming others…feeling defensive and constantly angry…feeling pressured with exams, expectations or work… feeling conflicted or struggling with indecision…dealing with a number of life challenges, all at once…transitioning a divorce or loss…moving house…work conditions or hours feel too much and conflict with family values…always feeling there is not enough time…are a self confessed perfectionist!…suffering a health symptom or addiction that hurts your feelings, causes shame and low self-esteem …

Stress awareness is the cornerstone of a vibrant energy lifestyle.  Get in touch with Suzi 07836 635233 to learn how to create reserves of vibrant energy to enjoy the quality lifestyle you deserve.  Sessions are designed to provide a strategy that makes life feel amazing for you.  Discover why it is vital to master your emotional and mental state with good feelings now.    

Appointments are available in Birchington, Whitstable, Witherdens Hall Retreat – Wingham (near Canterbury),  Kent and Harley Street, London W1.  Also Video Skype.

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3 Tips to Deal with Disappointment

Why Disappointment can limit your potential.  Disappointment is the emotion we feel when contrasted with a preferred expectation or ideal.  Disappointment feels terrible!   It is common to feel angry when we are hurt and upset, so for some, disappointment triggers anger.  Just like the classical Pavlov’s Dogs theory of conditioning an emotional response, disappointment, like many other uncomfortable emotions, can become a conditioned response that creates fear and avoidance.  Fearing disappointment can become a significant problem when stacked through repetition and association.

Take Action:

1. Anger is an active energy and as long as you don’t release your anger with aggression, you can release anger with any form of physical exertion.  Sport, exercise of any kind helps to process feelings of disappointment.

2.  Disappointment is an emotional state and you have the power to change how you feel.    Put your hand on your heart, breath in and out deeply as though you are breathing through your heart.  Continue to do so whilst imagining a favourite person, pet or loved one.  Take yourself on a holiday from cares or responsibilities for a few minutes whilst you allow yourself to turn up the colour, sounds, feelings of being on your favourite holiday with someone you love.  Make the picture big, bright and happy.  Continue to breath through your heart and notice how easy it was to change your emotional state.   So now decide how you are going to move forward and get busy creating a value inspired life.

3. If you like to write things down, clarify the disappointment and ask the question – how specifically is it a problem for me?   Having accepted and acknowledged responsibility for the problem, how can you manage or improve the situation?  What one action can you take?  Write it down?  If possible, choose three learnings or actions you can take within the next 24 hours and watch the helplessness disappear.

Disappointment paralyses growth    Humans are not designed to be perfect, yet we aspire to a perfection world.  High achievers with high standards will always be perfecting….In the long run, high achievers anxiety destroys, health, happiness, inner peace and fulfilment.

If you need further help to create a value inspired life, get in touch with Suzi on 07836 635233.

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Are you coping with grief?

Are you struggling to cope with a stressful relationship breakup or death of a loved one?

Losing someone or something you love is very painful. After a significant loss, you may experience all kinds of difficult and surprising emotions, such as shock, anger and guilt.  Sometimes it may feel like the sadness will never let up. As you deal with your loss, remember that  it’s important to be patient with yourself and allow the pain to pass.

Pain is inevitable, but suffering is a choice – your loved one would never want you to suffer.  We can get so locked into grieving and depression that it is easy to forget those who are living.

Loss is a personal trauma that can feel overwhelming.  It is helpful to allow your feelings to be whatever they are,  to just accept any emotions of guilt, anger, blame, regret and sorrow.

We begin the desparate road of asking non answerable questions, looking for all that we personally could have done differently. What others could or could not have done.  Prolonged emotional pain can change brain chemistry that leads to depression and isolation.  It is useful to distract yourself to keep your spirits up, but sooner or later you will benefit from getting making peace with your loss in whatever way helps you.

If you are wanting some confidential help with your feelings – Call Suzi on 01843 846947 or 07836 635233

Coping with a Breakup, Separation or Divorce

It’s never easy when a marriage or other significant relationship ends. The breakup of a long-term, committed relationship can turn your whole world upside down and trigger all sorts of painful and unsettling feelings. It is a difficult time to get through. Even in the midst of the sadness and stress of a breakup, you have an opportunity to learn from the experience to grow stronger.

Stress Awareness & Warnings

“A healthy person has a thousand wishes, a sick person only one.”    Stress is often considered to be normal, …

Setbacks or Sabotage?

Setbacks or Sabotage? How you deal with setbacks is significant.  Success coaching inspires us to seek the learning opportunities …

3 Tips to Deal with Disappointment

Why Disappointment can limit your potential.  Disappointment is the emotion we feel when contrasted with a preferred expectation …